Probability theory tells us that there are billions of planets in the universe with life on them. Many of these worlds are inhabited by ultra-intelligent, highly enlightened entities.
Some folks are skeptical about whether the aliens are really out there, though. They ask why these advanced beings don’t ever contact us. For these unbelievers, I have a pair of recent news stories to share.
1. In Chicago, there’s a pilot program that combines traditional high school education with vocational training, making sure that the graduates have the skills needed to get good-paying jobs. So far it has a 100% success rate. This groundbreaking initiative recently got $100 million in funding.
2. Meanwhile, Mark Zuckerburg, who we all know, just found out about an app that lets people on Facebook talk to people on Google+. He gave the inventors $19 billion. That’s almost 200 times the amount of money that was given to the schools.
We earthlings gave $100 million to finance a revolutionary approach to schooling, one that may end the skills gap among American workers, making our nation more competitive on a world scale.
We gave $19 billion for an app that lets a guy on Facebook say to his friend on Google+, “‘sup, bitch?”
And that, my dear readers, is why the aliens prefer to leave us alone.